WEST COAST SOUTHERN: June 2017

Take Care of You

I loved the part in the movie Pretty Woman when Julia Robert's character would hug her friend Kit De Luca and Kit would say, "Take care of you." I have always loved that line. To me it was like saying "be careful, I love you, take care of yourself" all combined. I wish I could use that line, but I don't think I could pull it off the way Kit and Julia could.

Genuinely caring for other people is an excellent quality. It is a quality I strive for. I don't like fake care. You know, the people who act like they care, asking you about yourself and then not caring one bit about the answer? Yeah, that kind of fake care. And of course there are the people who care so little they don't even bother asking or pretending. These people don't even care about acting like they care. A while back I was feeling hurt about the lack of interest some people were showing me. They seemed to have absolutely no interest in how I am, who I am, or what I do. I got all worked up, allowing the negative emotions to take over, when my husband said something I needed to hear.

"It doesn't matter."

Now normally, I would let a statement like this one to absolutely go all over me. I would fire back a quick, "OF COURSE IT MATTERS!" But it seems that with maturity come perspective and I have learned that he's right. Other people's interest in how I am, who I am, or what I do doesn't matter. I don't have to care about whether or not other people care. As long as I am mindful to take care of myself, I shouldn't put any energy into worrying about the fact that other people don't.

You see, when Kit says, "Take care of you" that is exactly what she's saying. Be sure to take care of yourself. Love yourself. Be kind to yourself. Don't expect anyone else to do it because they won't. The expectations that you are putting on others to care for you or about you will only leave you disappointed and hurt and bitching about it to your husband.

I recently stumbled upon an Instagram feed by a life coach who shared these 12 tips about self care. I love these. They are simple and true and and worth repeating as often as necessary.

If it feels wrong, don't do it.
Say exactly what you mean.
Don't be a people pleaser.
Trust your instincts.
Never speak badly about yourself.
Never give up on your dreams.
Don't be afraid to say, "No."
Don't be afraid to say, "Yes."
Be kind to yourself.
Let go of what you can't control.
Stay away from drama and negativity.
LOVE.

I often speak about making healthier choices in life. These 12 steps do just that. Caring for yourself is always a good choice. Be good to yourself and maybe, if you're lucky, others will be too.

Sneak Peek: What's in your purse?

I think the type of purse a woman carries says a lot about her. Fancy, simple, ornate, big, little. Purses come in all shapes and sizes and so do women. But I believe it is what a woman carries inside her purse that tells you who she really is. Imagine meeting someone for the first time saying, "Okay, now, let me see inside your purse." I think you would immediate come to know a lot about who that person really is. A messy purse? Probably a messy person. A simple purse with little inside? Probably a minimalist. A purse filled with books and snacks and lip stick? Probably somebody just like me.

So here's a little peek inside my purse. My purse is my tool box. My medicine cabinet. My carryall. And carry all it does. I always have tissues and wet wipes, ibuprofen and Dramamine. The mom in me still keeps Band-Aids and Neosporin on hand and although I don't need them often, I'm sure glad I have them when I do. I always have a Chico Reusable Bag just in case I forget to bring my own bag into a store. Some healthy snacks like a bag of trail mix from Trader Joe's is always a good idea. And don't forget a book. I always have a book with me. Which means that recently I had to start carrying reading glasses everywhere I go because, you know, 44 is super fun.

I'm also a total sucker when it comes to having multiple cute bags to go inside my cute bag. Sunglasses are a must, which requires a super cute case to carry them in. My Beautycounter Lip Sheers and Lip Gloss go in the handmade BESOS ("kisses" in Spanish) pouch from GAIA for Women. And the little bit of cash I do carry it goes in a super cute Rebecca Minkoff change purse.

So what does this say about me? That I come prepared. That I easily get motion sickness and headaches. That my purse is so clean that I'm either a Type A personality, have OCD or maybe both. That I'm a reader who's eyes are going bad. That I never carry cash (I've often been known to be inconveniently without cash in the times that I need it most), but I have snacks for any hangry emergency that I might have. That I'm all about a cute monogram and love purchasing handmade items. And that I care a lot about our planet, safer beauty, and healthy choices.

Here are my favorites currently in my purse: