The Devil is in the pantry.


The Easter candy in our house is really starting to piss me off. I've been so damn good for the last 3 1/2 months and now temptation has landed in my pantry in the form of a Reese's peanut butter egg.

It's easy to avoid sugar when it's not in the house which is exactly why I threw it all out when I gave up sugar in January. I was able to make it through 2 birthday cakes and Valentine's Day without so much as a taste. But now, for whatever reason, I'm having a flippin' hard time with all of the chocolate bunnies lying around.

Chocolate has always been my weakness. It's a family curse. As a little kid my mother was know as Chocolate so naturally when I came along I was given the name Little Chocolate.

I love any and all kinds of chocolate: milk, dark, white, semi-sweet, I love it all. I love it with nuts, in a brownie, poured over ice cream. I don't care what form it takes, just put it in a IV and give it to me straight.

The chocolate in my pantry has been talking to me. Come on, it whispers. One little teensy, weensy bite won't hurt. No ones looking. No one will know. Come on. Yeah, that's it. Closer...closer...closer. Yes! Hello, Mama!And yes, I'll admit it. I've slipped up and enjoyed a chocolate egg or two. All of the other candy? The jelly beans, the Peeps, the Twizzlers? Nope, none of those bother me. But the chocolate? Yeah, I just can't handle the chocolate being in the house.

So here's my plan. I'm just gonna go ahead and eat all of it and then it will be gone and I won't have to worry about it. Sounds about as smart as an alcoholic drinking all of the booze in the house. Yesterday I tried to throw out the chocolate, but got caught by the Candy Police (i.e., the Monkey.)

"No, no Mommy! That's Easter Hunt candy," he yelled as he grabbed the bag out of my hand.

So there it sits. In my pantry. Just waiting for me to open the door and take a bite.

Have I mentioned that I HATE BEING ON A DIET AND I DON'T MEAN TO YELL BUT ALL I WANT IS ONE OF THOSE DAMN CHOCOLATE MARSHMALLOW BUNNIES! IS THAT TOO MUCH TO ASK?

According to the scale in my bathroom, yes. It is.

2 comments :

Christine said...

Hahahaha!!!! Ahhhhh those damn peanut butter eggs. I sooooo get where you are coming from. Sounds just like me.

Dawn said...

Those peanut butter eggs are my favorite!!

I didn't buy any because of it. However, a dear friend made us some Easter treats and guess what was in there?!?! I finished 'em off last night! Ha!

I'll workout extra hard this week! (not that I haven't been already!)

Oh, then to top it off... the word verification is toffee!! ROFL!